Hold Hands

There is something deceptively simple, yet profound you can do to express your love for each other. At various moments, when your spouse least expects it, take his or her hand. Rueben and I hold hands walking down the street, sitting in the car, in church, at parties, all over the place. It is a beautiful way to show caring and affection.

Befriend Each Other's Friends

From the time we first started dating, to the present day, Rueben and I have made efforts to be friends to each other's friends. This is one more way to show each other how much we love each other. We also love the people who mean the most to each other. I have become very close to his best man, Mark, and he thinks the world of my matron of honor, Mithsou. When Mark was going through a rough time, recently, I wrote to him and prayed for him. And when Mithsou experienced a near-tragedy, Rueben encouraged and prayed for her. Tonight, Rueben and I are meeting a newlywed couple that he has been friends with for quite some time. I am looking forward to our time together! It is a beautiful thing to love the people that each other loves!

Find Ways to Stay Connected

Rueben and I usually have extremely different schedules and hardly have time to spend together. So we understand the importance of finding ways to stay connected. Last night, I went to bed at about 8:30 and he got home much later while I was in a deep sleep. But we planned ahead for this. We spoke before I went to bed and wished each other a good night. Likewise, he got up early this morning, but I didn't get up until after he was already gone, so I sent him an e-mail, knowing he can read my e-mail on his BlackBerry. No matter how much our schedules differ, we stay connected.

Remember Your Spouse is NOT Psychic

This morning, I felt a bit anxious about something and wanted my husband to talk me through it and change my mood. He did and it worked. But it only worked because I told him that I needed him and helped him to help me. I asked him to talk to me and gave some possible topics to discuss. Some women would have suffered in silence and waited in vain for a conversation to start. Then they would have resented that their husbands did not meet their needs. But you have to remember your spouse is NOT psychic. How will he or she know you want to talk unless you let them know directly?

Treat Each Other Like Gold

My husband is precious to me and I to him. We have great respect and affection for each other at all times. We always make every effort to show each other how important we are to each other. A smile, a laugh, a kiss, the holding of hands--little things go a long way to showing how much you love your wife or husband. And speak fondly about each other to others. It lets others know how happy you are to be with your spouse, plus fixes your mind, heart, soul, and spirit on your love.

Keep Your Word

Yesterday afternoon, Rueben and I made plans to have sex that night. We were both looking forward to it. He said he would be home at about 9:30 p.m. But when he got home I was wrapped up in a fascinating PBS special on religion in America. I was totally engrossed. I told him how engrossed I was and he watched with me. It was finally over at 11 and we had sex as we had planned. It was worth the wait. It was one of the best of all our times having sex over the years.

Apologize Quickly

I snapped at my husband this evening, but apologized just a moment later. What happened was my parents came for a visit. My mother was in a playful mood and asked for a beer (she almost never drinks at all). Anyway, at the time, I was busy serving dinner, so I handed the beer to Rueben and asked him to open it for her. He didn't realize that Samuel Adams is NOT a twist off, but, rather, requires an opener. He tried to hand it back to me saying an opener is needed. I barked at him to get up and get the opener. I was furious with him. But a moment later, I apologized for snapping. He accepted my apology. If you do or say something that requires an apology, don't hesitate. Apologize right away so the bad feelings cannot take hold of you or your spouse.

Pillow Talk

One of my favorite parts of the day is the end of the day, when Rueben and I go to bed. We lie together in the dark and talk about anything and everything that are on our minds. I look forward to that sacred, special connection I feel when I listen to Rueben, and he listens to me. While we talk, we often hold hands. We feel so close and connected during those times.

Love Your In-Laws

My husband and I enjoy showing love to our in-laws. We keep in touch with them as often as we can, and make plans to spend time with them whenever possible. Tonight, for instance, we are all going out to dinner together. We are looking forward to it!